Activities and Enhancers for Creating a Comforting Atmosphere

Aquariums
Aromatherapy…lavender, pine, chamomile, cinnamon, sage
Art, on walls, or originals from kids on the refrigerator
Baskets, boxes…filled with fun, sweet or funky things
Biographies…on TV or in books
Bird baths and feeders
Blankets, quilts, throws
Bread, baked goods, fresh from the oven
Brushing hair, washing hair for someone, pampering someone
Bubbles , Bubble Gum
Bubble Baths
Candles
Card Games
Cartoons
Chocolate
Cider
Crafts, hands-on hobbies, beading, clay, woodworking
Crossword Puzzles, Word Games
Comics
Curtains
Decorating, with new or old (rediscovered) things (curios, pictures, linens, keepsakes) Doodling
Facials, makeovers with make-up
Fire places, fires
Flowers…fresh, dried, silk, pictures of
Foot baths….with mineral salts
Fun magazines, newspapers (The National Enquirer and People Magazine are amusing)
Gardens….gardening, garden picture books and magazines
Goofing off, pottering around the house
Hugs Ice Cream
Journaling
Kaleidoscopes
Knitting
Lotions
Manicures, doing someone‘s nails 
Massage
Mashed Potatoes…Meat Loaf
Meditation and Reflection
Mobiles, hanging fun objects or art
Money…a little here and there, and inside cards
Music…soft jazz, light classical, light rock, or iPod faves
Nature objects…stones, feathers, shells, drift wood, moss
Photo albums and scrapbooks
Pillows, including stuffed animals and other soft things for furniture
Perfume, cologne, sprays
Prayer
Radio stations….your favorites, set for commutes and unwinding at home Relaxation and Guided Imagery CDs
Rocking Chairs
Sand trays, sand boxes, sandy beaches
Sayings, inspirational quotes, to put up on the wall
Sexual contact and intimacy
Soft lighting…lamps rather than overhead glare
Sports, ball games
Textures….weavings on the wall, wreaths, “warm fuzzies“, things you want to touch Toys, playing with toys, with your pet(s)and grownups, as well as kids (Frisbees, catnip toys)
Video-on-Demand, VOD, calming images, music, self-help activities, relaxation sessions
Water fountains
Welcome signs, banners and flags

Add to this:

Comforting Resources

For grief support and comforting:
Supporting Someone Who Is Grieving: www.helpguide.org/mental/helping_grieving.htm
Hospice Foundation of America, great grief/loss section:  www.hospicefoundation.org

For counseling, active listening, supportive and relational approaches to comforting:

Companioning approach, Alan Wolfelt
www.centerforloss.com, also helpful Griefwords section on this site

Person-centered approach, Client-centered Theory, Carl Rogers
The Association for Development of the Person Centered Approach, www.adpca.org About Carl Rogers, client-centered theory www.carlrogers.info

Relational/Cultural approach, Stone Center, Jean Baker Miller Institute www.jbmti.org at Wellesley College

For nursing/clinical approaches to comforting in medical settings:
Comfort Theory, Katherine Kolbaca, PhD, RN, www.thecomfortline.com

Val’s picks for books to inspire us as comforters:

Healing Conversations: What to Say When You Don’t Know What to Say
Nance Guilmartin
Wonderful stories about healing conversations with people going through hard times

Here if You Need Me
Kate Braestrup
Bestseller, Maine author, a chaplain‘s life-affirming memoir of helping people through grief, while coping with her own loss.

Turning to One Another
Margaret Wheatley
Personal insights and gentle reflections about how to communicate well with each other.

Continuing Bonds, New Understandings of Grief
Phyllis Silverman, Steven Nickman, Dennis Klass